Freedom Protestor or Gen Zer in a Fishing Vest?

These are scary times. What with Mark Zuckerberg co-opting your attention span for dollar bills and the imminent threat of a second Cold War, people don’t know who to trust. 

Made worse by the fact that our Canadian streets have become overrun with freedom protesters demanding things like an end to vaccine mandates and their right to bring a live bald eagle into a Tim Hortons undisturbed. 

But how do you know if you’re encountering a genuine freedom protestor or just a Gen Zer who has co-opted trucker/hunting fashion for kicks and cred? Below are some tips!

1. Hunting Galoshes

Really? You need clarification here? Are you at a protest on College Street or in the Backcountry? You can rest easy if you spot these galoshes in the city, you have spotted a genuine Gen Zer.

2. Grille Guard

Is the Grille Guard attached to a vehicle? Particularly an eight cylinder 1500 Ram? Congrats! You have found yourself a genuine freedom protestor!

3. Full Camo Gear

Ask said person if they are ‘bowhunting’, if they look confused, this is definitely a Gen Zer on a latte run.

4. Confederate Flag Dress

Definitely klan convoy.

5. Fishing Vest

Do you see a nearby lake? No? Then this is most definitely a Gen Zer who has never seen a fishing rod.

6. Oakley Sunglasses

Honestly, there’s no way to tell.

7. Kid Rock Back Tattoo

Grab your blowhorn, mama’s going protesting tn!!!!!

8. Coleman’s Red Cooler

If you spot someone carrying this cooler, you can be sure they are coming straight from a construction site to the freedom rally.

9. Ammo Belt

Say, “Are you wearing your ammo belt ironically?” If they say no, head to the freedom convoy!!!

10. John Deere Trucker Hat

A real trucker wouldn’t be caught dead wearing this kind of lefty emblem bullshit.

11. Hitler’s Skull

If said person is wearing a piece of Hitler’s skull as a hat, you can be sure they’re with the freedom convoy and not a Gen Zer heading to brunch.